Hello, my dear parent

There’s something we all need to remember

Happiness in life isn’t a given.

No matter how much we protect our child and do best to keep happy, sadness is an emotion to experience to value happiness.

No matter how much we love our child, finding love of life is the sweetest emotion ever felt. Let it stay the most cherished memories for your child. Crushing that love under your expectation of finding an ideal partner at the right time blocks the process of connecting with true love and ecstasy.

Finding and being happy is a full-time job. Please don’t perform it on behalf of your child.

He has to take charge of it. And own it.

No one can make him happy. No one can make her fulfilled. Not a partner, not a job, not money, and not a degree.

Happiness is a choice the child has to make, and it is hard.

[Image by Cheryl Holt on Pixabay]

To be happy, he has to fight off the feelings of guilt and inadequacy and the desire to please. She has to let go of the idea of perfectionism and see the beauty in the chaos of life.

He has to take responsibility—for his actions, words, and mistakes.

Happiness won’t just come. Your child has to reach out and take it. Sometimes be a little greedy with it.

He must take actions to fill his world with joy, and that sometimes means rejecting what you want him to do. It also means laying strong boundaries to protect him from people bringing their mess in his life.

It may sound easy to say, but it is difficult to practice, and it is hard to see your child fail.

Most parents want to come to the rescue. And do everything possible to keep the child happy.

But to stop right there and let her learn in her ways requires twice an effort. It is difficult for you. It’s been difficult for me.

The child must connect – to passion, to people, to peace and to contentment. It is child’s job to form deep relationships and find gratitude in little things. Not in tangible things as it’s a short fix.  

She must understand happiness is momentary and joy is what she must strive for. But that wouldn’t happen every day. Failure and disappointments will be around the corner.

And that’s okay.

The bleakest of moments can bring joy, that’s the lesson he must remember. During a fall rising out of the dark shadows is her real victory. Knowing what will bring peace and harmony is her strongest tool.

My dear parent, what’s the best part of being happy and contented?

To sprinkle happiness on others, to lift them and show light. To appreciate the blessing and use it compassionately. To represent equality.

Let your child know sometimes this will require setting up for judgements. Others might see you self-centred. But to protect whom you love and what matters to you, it’s okay to get selfish. To keep toxic people out, it’s okay to say no.

Resentment, guilt, and shame are heavy burdens to carry. Don’t let anyone mess up with your core values.

To love herself, you must show her what it means to be happy and grounded in the most complicated situations of life. Can you do that?

Your child deserves nothing but happiness, and that journey is for him to discover. Walk with her few miles, rest is her to explore. Let her trust in herself, while you trust in her.  

[Featured Image by Rita E on Pixabay]

Vandana Sehgal is an Author, Holistic Wellness Coach, and Book Coach. Holistic Wellness signifies a healthy balance between psychological, professional, physical, social, financial and spiritual aspects. Striving to find inner-happiness and outer-peace without letting relationships compromise is the objective of Holistic Wellness. As a Holistic Wellness Coach, Vandana helps you to find balance, health and joy in life.